Michael Moore (speaking as he get out of his cab): Rise up. Get rid of the name "British", in your province. You are your own province. You are your own country. You oughta get the Queen off the money, get the "British" out of the name. Just, do, man, just like... come on... you guys got such a great country, as it is. Just, like, get over it, man. Just get over it. That U.K. thing, man, the Brits, they're, like, dragging you down, man, they're like a big albatross , a big stone around your neck.

Nardwuar: Could we ask you some questions, Michael? Would that be okay?

Michael Moore: Yeah, Yeah, sure, okay.

Nardwuar: Vancouver is home of The Vancouver Film School!

Michael Moore: Oh, the great Vancouver Film School, and the famous alumni are...?

Kevin Smith, the guy who did Clerks. He was only there three months, but they take credit for him.

Yeah, that's right. (laughs)

So, Michael Moore, who are you?

I'm Kevin Smith.

How's Superman's cousin, Michael Moore?

Superman's cousin? Who was that?

From Roger & Me, the guy that got shot.

Oh, the poor guy that got shot, oh, he's alive. He's alive. He recovered. He was in a mental institution for a while, but he's okay now.

How does it feel to be back in Canada? Canada, home of '60s thinking and David Gilmore, the CBC?

(laughs) Is he still alive?

David Gilmore?


'60s thinking. You're getting '60s thinking. You know what I'm referring to there, eh, Michael Moore?

No, I'm talking about David Gilmore. Is he still with us?

Yes, he's still functioning.

He's still functioning. (laughs) How do they keep him alive, is there, like, some secret drug or somekind of thing that the undertaker uses to prop him up?

Taxpayer's money!

Oh, taxpayer's money, oh, that's it.

You '60s thinker, you!

Oh! That's what the CBC guy said to me, right?

In an interview.

That's right. The head of the... who was that guy, anyways?

Alex Frame, or something like that.

Yeah, he kept pounding on me. He goes "Aah, You're still in the '60s. You got '60s thinking," you know. And I'm going "'60s thinking, I was like three in the '60s." (laughs)

How are you doing, Michael Moore? How are you doing?

I'm tired.

Now, are you like, blacklisted?

Am I black?

'Cause I'm afraid that you're like blacklisted. You're going to be like Orson Welles. You know Orson Welles did...

What happened to him?

Citizen Kane. And Michael Moore did...


Roger & Me... Orsen Welles fought William Randolph Hearst, Michael Moore fought...

Well, you keep answering the questions.

Roger Smith! Are you okay, though? Are you gonna be okay? Are you going to be blacklisted? Is your life paralleling his?

Ahh, well, I don't think so. I've been very fortunate you know. First I got Roger & Me out there, then TV Nation, two summers of TV Nation, we won the Emmy award, and now my book just went on the bestseller list, Downsize This!

Canadian Bacon, didn't they kind of screw you on that? Because, that was a great film. Did it even get an official US release? Like Orsen Welles, he was kinda screwed. Are you like Orsen Welles? Canadian Bacon, could that have been an Orsen Welles film?

No, I don't think so. They did this market research with Canadian Bacon, the US company, and their test results told them that people didn't want go laugh at a film with a guy who had died. Namely, John Candy. So, because of that, and because they felt that Americans would think that the film was too anti-American, they did not give it the proper distribution in America.

How much influence do these movie executives have? Did they force you to hire Karen "MTV" Duffy? What was she doing on there, what was she doing on TV Nation?

What are you? You know, this is a prime example of people who drink too much coffee here in this part of the country. You know...

Karen "MTV" Duffy! Why was she there? Louis Thereaux, he was way better. How, how, how many hours a day do you spend at Starbucks, sir? You've got to calm down. Karen "MTV" Duffy! What's the explanation behind her?

What do you mean "What's the explanation behind her?" Look at her dammit, you know, she's great. What are you talking about?

How can you single people out? Isn't it kind of scary to single these executives out. I understand you're going to be picketing outside of Nike. Isn't it dangerous? I mean you're targetting these people, these people killed Kennedy, Michael Moore. Aren't you a bit worried?

(laughs) Okay, I'm convinced now, it's not coffee, it's crack. The guy is on crack. What was the question? I forgot the question.

The question here was: Roger Smith was a bad guy. Roger was a bad guy. Does that make Bill Gates a good guy, because he's hiring lots of people? Bill Gates, the computer age, is he a good guy Michael Moore?

Bill Gates is the anti-Christ.

But he's hiring people.

No, he's the anti-Christ. The anti-Christ will always come, it says it in The Bible, in Revelations, Chapter 6, Verse 3.

But, but...

No, no, listen. I'm giving you a Bible lesson dammit, listen to me. You know, Bill Gates, he's come here to hire a lot of people, and to shift the technology into a situation where he will rule the world. He will rule the world. Do you understand?

Roger & Me. Don't you think that it was better than Canadian Bacon? Was Roger & Me better than Canadian Bacon, Michael Moore?

Roger & Me was better in Canadian than it was in English.

Are they forcing you to comedy? You're writing sitcoms now. Are they trying to dull you? You know, like Matt Groening, he did Life in Hell and it became The Simpsons. Are you going to end up that way? Please don't do it, Michael Moore. Don't give up...

You don't like The Simpsons?

No, it's been mellowed out since Life in Hell. Remember? Matt Groening did Life in Hell and now he's off to...

Oh, man, Life in Hell sucked, man. Life in Hell sucked. You couldn't even read the damn thing.

Are they trying to mellow you out? By doing TV Nation and now you're doing Canadian Bacon, now you're writing sitcoms. Like, please don't give up, Michael Moore. They're pushing you into that home...

I won't let you down. I promise, I promise, I promise, I promise. (hugs Nardwuar) I won't let you down. I won't do it!

Did you know that Mark Farner of Grand Funk Railroad has a dog named after him?

Mark Farner is, like, supporting the Michigan Militia right now. I mean it's like pretty scary stuff.

And finally, Michael Moore, we'd like to thank you, here in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. You've inspired people. Like TV Nation. TV Nation you had the thing about the car alarms, where you played the car alarms outside of the guy's house.

Yeah, that was cool.

And people in Vancouver, while the Molson Indy was happening in Vancouver, played Indy sounds outside of the Mayor's house, to tell him how bad it was with the noise.

Oh (laughs), really? Oww, that's so cool.

Thank you so much for the inspiring...

The inspiration. (laughs)

Thank you so much for inspiring people. And now, I must go meet the Magnificent Ambersons, thank you. Thank you, so much, Michael Moore, now going to a Fox broadcast. Keep on rocking in a free world, and... Fox are milking you now, they better take your show, is your show going to be on, just quickly, yes or no?

Yes, TV Nation will be on.

So Fox has picked it up.

Noooo, the BBC have put up the money for a whole new season.

Are we going to be seeing it on the Fox?

You're going to see it here on CTV.

Why won't we see it on the Fox? You're doing that press conference for them.

Are you an American or a Canadian?

They're manipulating you.

Are you an American or a Canadian?

They're manipulating you.

What are you? An American or Canadian?

I love both nations.

Which are you?

I'm an anti-fascist.

What are you? An American or Canadian?

I'm an anti-fascist. I am a Canadian, born July 5, 1968.

Okay, dammit. Now, why would you care if it's on Fox, if I just told it's going to be on CTV? What do you care if it's on Fox?

You are going to a press conference to milk Fox. Why are you milking Fox, when they are not gonna air TV Nation?

I'm going to a party that's put on by Random House, dammit, the publisher of my book right now.

But, you're actually going to do a live satellite feed with the Fox network.

Oh, no, it's a special tonight on the election, in America, that's going all out across the country.

I just think that Michael Moore should boycott Fox, unless they show TV Nation, you should not do any TV, you should not handle the regular media.

(silence) Okay.

Well, thank you very much, Michael Moore. Keep on rocking in a free world and doot doola doot doo...

Okay, doot doot.

All seven minutes worth!

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