Have you heard that Vanilla Ice versus Eminem thing that is on the Internet, where they mix the two together?
Yeah sure---

Like it sounds awesome!
Yeah.

Like Eminem's beats sound amazing with you!
Yeah, it's 'cause I, 'cause I flow over that stuff y'know? It's fun.

What's the deal on 3rd Bass? Did they really call you the anti-Christ, Vanilla Ice?
Oh, man I have been called way worse than that. I love it all, man. I sit out here and I burn a path, I'm full-on jackass rockstar. And everywhere I go I burn a path, y'know? And it irritates some people and then some people are entertained by it. I'm catering to those who are entertained by it. The ones that it irritates, I don't really care. It's kinda fun actually that I can come through and stir up so much of a ruckus. [laughs]

Did you order a 'hit' on 3rd Bass at all?
Ah, man that's the joke, dude. It's all entertainment man. I've never even met 'em to be honest with you. So there's no beef.

Do you have a tougher time, do you think, Vanilla Ice because you didn't lose your money? Like MC Hammer lost his money, but you didn't, so people don't think it's funny. I mean you survived, you won, but then people don't think that's funny.
I don't think that there's a winning to it about holding onto your money or not. Because in '94 I tried to commit suicide with 20 million dollars in the bank and I couldn't even buy myself a friend. I know some people out there are going, "I'll be your friend, give me a million." No. But for real, I mean I live in Miami so it's a lot of plastic and people just hanging out with silicone and it's pretty crazy out there, so you don't know who your real friends are. And that's why I got back into motocross, I found my real friends and---

Vanilla Ice, was it real estate that kept you going through the money thing? Are you a big Tom Vu type guy? What's the deal Vanilla Ice? What's the secret? Is real estate keepin' you going?
Hey, real estate works for me. It might not work for everybody but it's, it's I've never played the stock market. It's done great things for me over the years. It's kind of an accident that I fell into it, but I learned real simple and it was simple as a pimple, y'know? Every house that I bought it make money when I sold it so, uh, I just learned that just let me buy a bunch of houses and sell 'em. I mean it was that simple and it sounds like there was a lot more to it, but you don't need to buy the tapes or the infomercialson TV and all that stuff to learn to buy and sell houses. You just do it and that's how you make your money. The stock market is a gamble.

Vanilla Ice, do you still have the top selling rap album of all time? Is that still To The Extreme? Is that still you Vanilla Ice? Do you still hold that honour?
I don't know. I really don't check the stats every day but I probably assume. It's been there for a long time and it's probably stand there for a long time. It's just one of those things that I'm proud of and it's amazing and it's - I didn't expect it and what an impact, y'know?

Well congrats! I wanna give you some props, that's amazing!
Yeah, yeah it is amazing. I mean I never expected it, so I'm grateful for that, for sure.

Now you were in Madonna's Sex book and you claim that you were in there "unknowingly". How did you "unknowingly" end up in a "sex book" ?
No, no don't change it around. Not unknowingly, well actually you're right. [laughs] I was going out with her, OK. I was going out with her at the time and, uh, it was really crazy. I just went over there and I am always used to people taking pictures and everything and she starts taking her clothes off, which she does even with pictures or not y'know. So she starts taking her clothes off and they start taking pictures and everything and I'm not thinking any big deal. I didn't think anything was going to come of these pictures or anything. And then y'know about eight months down the line I see this hard copy, metal jacket Sex book she releases and uh, y'know it, just to see me and how everything was portrayed in the whole book and everything it just kinda threw me into her slutty package. And I wasn't very happy to be a part of it. All my friends are like, "Yeah, dude!" but I had mixed emotions for it, y'know? Because I kinda felt for her at that time and to see her portrayed just full-on, sex-fiend freak, y'know it was pretty shocking 'cause I knew it wasn't her.

Well how do you feel right now, because Madonna said it was a mistake to pose with Vanilla Ice? That's kinda mean.
Naw, she says it's a mistake because I keep talking shit about her. I told her that, that was the biggest regret I have out of most of the stuff I have done, was being in her book. We didn't depart too happily. So I don't know if there's gonna be any kind words there but I still got love for her, there's not anything going on today, all the bitterness or whatever is fine today. We're happy today, but back in the day we went out different ways, y'know?

And now there are many people who are happy to work with you Vanilla Ice. Iron Maiden! What's the 7th times 70 thing, you're working with Iron Maiden?
Isn't that hardcore man? That's awesome dude. They're my heroes, man. And it's just an honour, y'know. Just working with Soulfly and Slipknot and all these multi-platinum, multi-talented bands and groups and stuff is just such an honour for me. For them to respect me as a musician as well and to honour me by being on my record with me and I couldn't be more happy.

Vanilla Ice, you had some wicked hair.
Yeah.

You had some dope hair. But so did Kid Rock, everybody had that style back then, didn't they?
Yeah, that pompadour? Yeah, remember that? That straight up, ska ska! It's like your grandma pulling out pictures of you that you're ashamed of or embarrassed of, but I can look back at it and I can laugh now. I can laugh at myself or whatever, but at the time man, I had to live it out. I mean, from the success I hibernated man, for a long time because I was only 16 when I wrote "Ice Ice Baby." So I was ordering pizza in my house. I couldn't go out; I couldn't go shopping, couldn't do anything. Then all of a sudden I just said "Fuck it, I'm going to face my adversity." Sorry you gotta edit that. [laughs]

Whose idea was it to have the hair? Whose idea was it to shave the eyebrows? 'Cause the eyebrow shave thing was cool.
[laughs] I shaved my eyebrows. I did the stuff and the hair and stuff, it was all for fun. It was just a joke, but it was amazing the impact it had. It's just super amazing and for it to carry over to today and for people to respect and embrace what I am doing today just means the world to me. I'm just so blessed; it's great.

What's the deal between you and puppets Vanilla Ice? Are you really afraid of puppets? What's the deal? I love puppets!
Well man I've got a few hang-ups in life. I'm a little weird on certain things. I'm attention deficit disorder and puppets to me scare the hell out of me. I'm really scared of puppets and midgets, man. [laughs] No, no problem. I mean it's really just, I don't know what it is. It's like y'know a black cat crossing your path if you are superstitious. You're gonna be like, you're gonna be like, "Whoa, get this black cat" y'know what I mean; trying to stay in front of it. You're not going to walk under a ladder. Well to me, puppets are evil. They scare the hell outta me man and I don't know why. Maybe it was Chucky, growing up on the movie, y'know. I don't know. But, uh, they scare me.

Vanilla Ice, you have played so many amazing places. I was noticing looking at your tour thing and you're playing The Keg and you're also playing like Frat houses. What's the difference between playing The Keg and a Frat house? What's it all like? The Keg, Frat houses?
It's cool man. We, we hit all the towns, the big ones. We hit Calgary and then we come back to Regina and Saskatoon and even last night Chilliwack, man. We hit 'em, y'know. It doesn't matter---

That's a good rap name isn't it? Can you freestyle on "Chilliwack" for a second there Vanilla Ice?
[raps] Chilliwack, Chillimack that's what it's all about. Gimme the attack, like 420 baby, that's what I'm all about. Sittin' right here givin' the scream and shout, gonna turn it out. Unh!

Yeah!
[laughs]

What was it like opening for NWA there, Vanilla Ice? Just winding up here. Opening for NWA, what was that like?
It was kinda scary actually 'cause I was, like I said, real young; I did the whole Stop The Violence tour and everything. And I was with Ice T and that's actually when I first got my big break, was with Ice T and them, and Stetsasonic and EPMD. But it was crazy because I didn't know about the studio gangster thing back then, I thought it was all real. Drive-bys and shootings. I was like, "Good, I'm glad that they y'know they're cool with me." [laughs] I didn't want them to kill me man.

Are you friends with any of the other "Ices?" Y'know like Ice Cube, well you just said Ice T. Are you friends with any of the "Ices"?
Yeah totally, we're all cool. Yup, Ice T I have been cool with since '89, man. So it's been really good. He's a good guy. Actually I am doing some shows with him coming up soon here in the States.

Now I heard this rumour, I don't know if you want to answer it or not, but I heard a rumour. Did you go to a party put on by Naomi Campbell?
I did, I did. Back in the day.

Now I heard that you were necking with Corey Feldman in a hot tub at Naomi Campbell's place. Is that true Vanilla Ice?
C'mon, Hasselhoff, I don't get that friendly, man. [both Vanilla and Nardwuar laugh]

Baboom.
You're pushin' it.

Thank you very much Vanilla Ice. Anything else you wanna add to the people out there at all?
Um, just wanna say check out Vanillaice.com for any details of anything I got coming up. Check it out. Don't sleep on it; we are who we are because of who we were. So thanks for embracing who I am today.

Vanilla Ice, I want to leave with a quote, and the quote goes, "Shit! A white boy can dance like that?" And do you know who said that Vanilla Ice?
Who?

Chuck D.
Nice, yeah, Chuck D.

And I wondering, can you maybe do a couple moves for us. Just please for---
I'll do a move called The Transformer for ya. Check it out, it's called the Transformer. This is one that I used to do back in the day. I still breakdance every now and then but I've had so many motocross crashes. I broke my wrist and stuff, so I don't do many headspins anymore.

So you're going to do one for us?
I am going to do the Transformer. This is a Transformer.

By Vanilla Ice!
[growls] Yes!

Ice Ice baby.
Yeah! [laughs]

Yeah! Let's give 'em a beat, give him a beat! [Nardwuar motions to crowd in the alley behind the club waiting to talk to Vanilla Ice]
No, no, no. I don't need a beat, I don't need a beat, I don't need a beat, dude! Just check it out. Here we go. Ya ready? Watch it! Watch it. I'm gonna tear it up, alright?

OK, OK.
This is The Transformer. [Vanilla Ice then magically turns his body into a rubber band!] That's The Transformer. That's it.

Aw, Vanilla Ice in tha house!
[laughs] That's one of the old school moves I did in Cool As Ice, man. I'm surprised I still remembered that.

Well Vanilla Ice, why should people care about Vanilla Ice? Why should people care?
Because I just said it man, we are who we are because of who we were. And, uh, my life through the eyes of the camera and the TV is very entertaining. Enjoy it because I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Well thanks very much Vanilla Ice. Keep on rocking in the free world. And doot doola doot doo...
Doot doo. [laughs]